Get Out! 
Monday, July 11th, 2005
Well, I really have nothing to talk about. I’m presently waiting for my nails to dry, and typing is one of the few things I can do that won’t mess them up. Have I mentioned that I like, totally never paint my nails? Unless we’re talking construction or something. Then I know that it’s very important to seal the heads up so they don’t rust so much. A-yup. Why have I painted my nails, you didn’t ask? I dunno. Something to do with the futility of life and shiny paint maybe. Boredom possibly.
Have you ever come to the realization that you have nothing in common with anyone? Yes, yes, I know that everybody’s special and that everyone is the same, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about goals and motovation and crap like that. I haven’t decided if it’s liberating or depressing.
On another tack……
Do you know what I want more than anything? I want a little snug modern house with pretty flowers and a nice lawn on about 300 acres with a creek and some big trees and a rich-soiled high-boxed and fenced-in garden. I want a cow, a donkey, 10 or 15 chickens, 2 cats and as many corgis and also rat terrier mutts running around as I can feed. I want to stay there with my critters and my husband and for us to only ever leave to go on wonderful trips all over the world. (And maybe to go to a Target once in awhile, very early in the morning before the yabbos get there.) I want to work and to get something more than a piece of paper that people say is valuable. I want to dig in the dirt, I want to collect my chicken’s eggs, I want to scub my house dry-bone clean. I want to be tired, not from listening to whiners and complainers all day while making a rich man richer, but because I worked at what I wanted for me and my own all day. I don’t want to live in this pitiful excuse of a community anymore. I don’t want to eat poisoned food anymore. I don’t want to be angry and frustrated at stupid, stupid people anymore. I want out.
I want out.